one dance-bar-visit does not a pevert make; a.k.a. grant road chi rani

i'll cut to the chase, i visited a watered-down, now inexplicably un-glorious, dance-bar tonight (technically, i visited 2, but 'carnival' will not allow people of the woman-persuasion in, so that was a flop)

anyhoo, i visited Topaz, which, my 2 male-persuasion companions, and our driver assured me, was a one-time, super-smoking dance-dance bar in the best mumbai tradition. now, it's just sad, and wierd, kind of.

the singing was still lusty, and the women still capable of smokin' hotness, it's just that the license was gone. and for the life of me, i couldn't figure out why.

the only people who could have been affected by dance bars were the women (a.k.a. wives) and children whose men/fathers were blowing up livelihoods within those walls... did they really amount to enough numbers/votes to warrant a clampdown on the seedy loveliness/liveliness that it all was?

or, like one of my group said, was it that, a couple of years back, someone took the call; and now no-one had the balls to reverse it? (every vote counts for more today, i suppose)

in any case, i went to Topaz tonight. and being one of the female persuasion, i merited as much attention as 'fly-on'wall'/'random freak of angrez-education'/'emancipated vagina-card-carrier, but closet-lesbian'- their pick.

all this woo-hoo'ness, was at the behest of my 2 male companions; who remembered the place from its glory days, and our driver who once used to live in the area (again, a glory-day wallower)

supposedly, as urban legend has it, a raid at Topaz once yielded 8 crore rupees (our driver led me to believe all of it was SWEPT up off the floor! like AS IF!! like, really??)

in any case. there were a bunch of nostalgia-giddy losers there when i went (i was spared a few glances and dismissed immediately)

they were flinging notes of twenties at the (VERY disinterested) 3 faux-straight haired lovelies in sequin-spangled-sarees that were standing about- "show me some gandhi-notes bitches! and i MAY deign to wiggle some jelly atcha!"

there was LIVE music, mostly kumar-sanu'esque ballads sung by 2 chaps and a (once-glorious, satin-gown-wearing) older chick.

the younger of the chaps had a truly good voice, and would have won my vote (if i'd watched him) in any reality music show today. the other chap? ho-kumarsanu-hum.

the older chick? well now... interesting... she was an obvious hottie in her heyday, had a nice body (bit frayed around the edges), and a FAR better voice than either of the mangeshkar sisters' in their a.r.rehman/bala/kanika/faux-patriot, for-theatres-in-maharashtra-only, national-anthem renditions today.

we stuck around for one drink, slipped some hundreds for form's sake, and left; tried to enter the afore-mentioned Carnival in Worli, lucked-out, and returned to our respective homes.

end-note: as things panned out in Topaz; in spite of my obvious appreciation of the young (half-decent-looking) CHAP-singer; in my friend's enthusiasm that i reward SOMEONE, i ended up slipping the ex-hottie, woman-singer a 100-rupee note with a smile and sincerely-paid compliment.

summation: i should have either been a nostalgia-drunk, lonely male-person, or a lesbian; the universe had ordained either one or the other; i just missed both those lightning-bolts is all. sigh.