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sigh.. this blogging biz'ness is a bit of a menace.

it is. well, if you're commitment-phobic like me anyway.
(it waxes & wanes from mild, to full-blown 'get-out-of-here!', depending on what i've taken up, and would now like to diss)

let's take this blog, my fence-sitting, ramble-spittoon; it niggles the back of my skull with its being, and gnaws me into worrying about it.

so here i am, on a fine saturday afternoon trying to figure out what to say to it.

right, life update!
(in my own random, terrible-memory assisted fashion)
1. back from jaipur

2. been doing some great eats, but i'm only going to give small shout-outs in this post to:
- flamboyente- the pretentiously-named, kinda over-priced, but for-all-that rather decent, pan-asian place that's opened in my office building (praise be!)
- moshe's- more more! been there twice after and have had a lovely time, both times
- fassos- in pune, didn't actually go there, but had excellent mutton-on-basmati (which is to say, NOT biriyani) delivered home and it rocked! and yes, i still have to try those boti-wraps.
- flags- again, the one in pune. and it was lovely, have now put the one in mumbai on my list of semi-swish, escape-from-office-pantry lunch places.

3. met up with a new friend whom i'd only been chatting with until that point, and spent a lovely saturday hanging out with him, and his friend

4. went away to pune to do some more hanging out with the afore-mentioned two new people. and again, it was great. blissed out and relaxing in the best way.

5. through all of this, have been nursing a debilitating and sense-numbing crush on an entirely unsuitable someone.

6. feeling vaguely bridget-jones'ish through it all without the silver lining of a colin firth-type waiting in the wings for me to get over my stupidity (er, not that the chap's an 'emotional fuckwit' or anything. actually, if i think of it, he's more colin firth than hugh grant- dammit!)

7. sigh, now spending my days sternly lecturing myself out of the silliness that has been my state of mind these past few months and into... dunno yet, a better place anyway.

which brings me to the things i've been doing/plan to do, to get to that better place.
- been hanging with my darlings in c'pok- sodab, jonty, kappu, sahu, beju, hugs galore!

- having looong phone calls with liz, my most-popo, to save what's left of my sanity and generally know that i'm worth much more than the rubbish i usually subject myself to.

- went away to pune to hang with thunk and mahaya; in a move that's a complete break from my otherwise hate-to-inflict-myself-upon-you, vaguely-awkward-around-new-people self.

- am buying a guitar! (and hoping deeply that the move does not fan the afore-mentioned p-h-o-b-i-a, plus my bloody finances have to allow for it)

- will continue to hang out more often with the FC crowd and improve my skills at MINGLING (slight shudder)

- desperately want to go home. be around the bright-green'ness that is kerala after the rains, while ignoring all the things that made me want to leave the place; meet with sangs over a coffee and dosa at BTH or sarovaram (braving god-awful traffic)

- must visit b'lore, many people there who make me very, very happy to be around.

- and lastly, must limit self-indulgent wallowing-type posts such as this to barest minimum.

yes this has probably been a really boring, gross-type read, but i had to do it; acknowledge messily one time that i've let things slide, and i hate myself for it.